Thursday, July 4, 2013

Disaster Strikes! (aka, my attempt at homemade bread)

Everything has been going so well with my new recipes this summer... until last Sunday. When I got home after being gone for almost a week, I was suddenly struck with the impulse to STAY CAUGHT UP on my one new recipe a week this summer! Hurry, hurry! Must make Herb & Cheese Bubble Loaf!

I apparently have a budding cook/chef/baker in my son, as I learned that while I was gone he was Handy Helper in the kitchen. I'm all about it - a man who can cook makes a fine husband, speaking from experience - so future wife of my son, you're welcome.

Now, bread is a tricky thing - I had a bread maker years ago that I successfully made pizza crust in approximately three times. Most expensive pizza crust EVER. Beyond that, my bread experience primarily consists of cornbread. No yeast, about six ingredients, and a family recipe from Aunt Lurlene.

The bubble loaf, though - lots of ingredients. Including yeast. And no thermometer in the kitchen to check the temperature of the liquid before I add it to the dry mixture. But I have a Kitchenaid mixer!!! Doesn't that make everything come out right??

Note the bread hook. I'm practically a professional.
Follow the recipe; measure the ingredients; do everything in the right order. Check, check, check. 

Knead the dough. Everyone wants in on this part.

Then we came to the let it rise part. This was where I got my first indication that maybe, possibly, potentially, everything wasn't as it should be. I maaaaaaybe killed the yeast. Because it really didn't rise much.

Did that stop me? NO!! Drive on!!!!

Roll it out, cut the dough, form into dough balls to make the bubbles.

And here... here is where the train picked up speed going over the cliff. The recipe calls for the dough balls to be rolled in the butter and herb mixture before put into the dish for baking. Oregano, marjoram and parsley, to be precise. Three seemingly innocent herbs just waiting to be mixed with butter to make my recipe of the week delicious.

The final product:

Yuuuuuuuuuck. Yes, I know the bread didn't rise. Yes, I know I'm not a master baker by any means. But that's not my final assessment. This is.

Curse you, oregano.

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